F3ll0wsh1p of teh R1ng

I stumbled on to this Fellowship of the Rings in gamer form. Funny stuff, although I think I like If WW2 Was Fought By Gamers better :) Its still funny stuff.

[At Bilbo’s 111th Birthday]
Merry: “Omg, I pwn”
Pippin: “Sif, I pwn”
**Rocket goes off
Gandalf: “Pwned!”
Bilbo: “This = shiz, bai foos”
Bilbo has left the server
Frodo: “***!?”

[later, in Bag End]
Gandalf: “Give teh ringz0r to Frodo”
Bilbo: “Sif! It r precious!”
Gandalf: “STFU NOOB!!!”
Bilbo: “ok”
Gandalf has logged on as admin
Bilbo has been kicked from The Shire

**Later
Gandalf: “Show me teh ring, foo!”
**Gandalf rides out, does some research, comes back
Gandalf: “OMGZ, it R teh ring!”
Frodo: “***?”
Gandalf has logged on as admin
Frodo has been kicked from The Shire
Sam has been kicked from The Shire

[At Isengard]
Gandalf: “sup dawg, i r g4nd4lf da gr3y!”
Saruman: “Foo! U R teh noob!”
Gandalf: “***?!”
Saruman: “Sauron pwns joo!”
Gandalf: “Sif, I R leet”
**Sarumon beats the **** out of Gandalf
Saruman: “Pwned!”

[on the road to Bree]
Merry: “look foos, shrooms!”
Pippin: “Woot! Shrooms!”
Frodo: “Ph34r!”
Sam: “Shrooms!”
Frodo: “PH34R!1!1”
**black rider stops, sniffs, goes past
Frodo: “OMG, packetloss!”

[Bree, in the Inn of the Prancing Pony]
**Frodo is drinking and dancing on a table, then slips
Frodo has left the server
Frodo has connected to the server
Frodo: “OMGz, dc’d”
Aragorn: “OMG, noobz”

[at Weathertop]
Merry: “Mmm, shrooms!”
**MERRY IS BROADCASTING HIS IP ADDRESS!!!
Frodo: “Foos! Ph34r teh haxorz”
**the black riders attack
Merry: “OMG!!!”
Sam: “O.M.G!!!11”
Pippin: “***”
Frodo has left the server
**head nazgul stabs Frodo’s ghost
Frodo has connected to the server
Frodo: “***… hax!”
**Aragorn lraps into the fray with a flaming brand
Aragorn: “PH34r!!!!!!”
Merry: “LOLOL flamed! ”

[on the road to Rivendell]
Aragorn: “ZOMG!Arwen!”
**Arwen rides up
Aragorn: “A/S/L? Wanna net secks?”
Arwen: “Sif! *** is up with Frodo?”
Sam: “teh leet Hax0r ”
Arwen: “Firewall?”

**Arwen rides off with Frodo, the nazgul give chase. Arwen crosses the ford at Rivendell.
Arwen: “PH34R!! My dad pwns urs!”
**nazgul start to cross
Arwen: “LOLOLOLO noobs!!1!”
**the ford rises up and washes the nazgul away
Warning: Connection Problems Detected
nazgul has disconnected
nazgul has disconnected
nazgul has disconnected
nazgul has disconnected
nazgul has disconnected
nazgul has disconnected
nazgul has disconnected
Arwen: “Pwnt”

[at the Council of Elrond]
Gimli: “dwarves pwn!”
Legolas: “Sif, Elves pwn!”
Boromir: “OLOLOL noobs, men pwn!”
Elrond: “STFU tards!!1!”
**Frodo puts the ring on the plinth
Gimili: “Sif ring pwns all!”
**Gimli swings his axe at it, which shatters
Elrond: “**sigh, noob”

[Frodo meets up with Bilbo]
Bilbo: “OLOL, me = 10th level thief!”
Frodo: “OMG, u r teh pwn!”
Bilbo: “Do u still have teh ringz0r?”
**Frodo shows Bilbo the One Ring
Bilbo: “OMG u tard, I want to TK you!”
Frodo: “sif!”
Bilbo: “ph34r my mithril”

[The Fellowship leaves Rivendell]
**Gandalf leads the fellowship through the mountains
Legolas: “ZOMG, leet gfx!”
Gimli: “I R dropping frames! FFS”
**There’s an avalanche which threatens to knock them off the shelf
Gimli: “Gandalf, teh draw distance is too far!1!!1”
Gandalf: “**Sigh. Moria?”
Gimli votes to change map to Moria
Votes 4 of 4 required
Legolas: “lolol Gimli, time to upgrade!”

[The fellowship approaches the gates of Moria]
Gandalf: “FFS, its too hard! Anyone got a walkthrough?”
**The gates of Mordor open, but the Guardian attacks!
Frodo: “OMG! ph34r!”
Boromir: “GL HF”
Aragorn [broadsword] guardian
Legolas [arrow] guardian
Gandalf: “gg”

[The fellowship enters the mines of Moria]
Gimli: “OMG!!!! PWNED!”
**After travelling some time in the dark the Fellowship come to a chamber with a large well
Gandalf: “teh bookz0r has some clues!”
**Merry knocks a skeleton in armour down the well
Gandalf: “OMG! noob!”
Merry: “d’oh”
**The fellowship hears the ork drums
Boromir: “***?”
Aragorn: “***?”
Frodo: “…”
Gandalf: “Oh ffs >.< " **the fellowhip shores up the doors as the orks come Boromir: "TEAMS FFS!" Aragorn [broadsword] ork Gimli [axe] ork Legolas [arrow] ork Aragorn [broadsword] ork Aragorn [broadsword] ork Boromir [broadsword] ork Gimli [axe] ork Gimli [axe] ork ork: "OMG! h4x!" Gimli: "pwned"! Legolas [arrow] ork Legolas [arrow] ork Legolas: "lol!!" Boromir [broadsword] ork Gimli [axe] ork Gimli: "Foos!" Legolas [arrow] ork ork: "ffs, wallhax!" **The cavetroll enters the chambers destroying the doors Gandalf: "Oh ffs!" Boromir: "Omg, its teh boss!" Aragorn: "Sif noob, we're not at teh end yet!" **Cavetroll slams Boromir and Aragorn out of the way, and then skewers Frodo Sam: "OMG!" Gandalf: "OMG!" Aragorn: "omg, pwn!" **Legolas jumps on the cavetroll and shoots arrows down into its head Legolas [arrow] cavetroll Ork: "OMG! PWNED!" Gimli: "LOLOOLOL! noobs" **The fellowship then runs through Moria, chased the whole way by a horde of orks Boromir: "FFS! Teams, foos!" **A flaming shadow starts to follow them, and the orks withdraw Aragorn: "Now THIS is teh boss!" Gandalf: "OMG!" **The fellowship take to long flights of stairs that are starting to crumble and fall. Orks shoot at them with arrows. Legolas: "LOL, noobs. Chex0r this out!1!" Legolas [arrow] ork Legolas [arrow] ork ork: "AIMBOT!" ork: "turn it off!" Legolas: "lolol!" **The fellowship crosses a bridge, Gandalf stops to confront the balrog Gandalf: "joo shall not pass!" Balrog: "***?" Gandalf: "JOO SHALL NOT PASS!" Balrog: "Sif, noob" **Gandalf strikes the bridge with his staff, cracking it and causing it to break under the Balrog's weight Balrog: "ZOMG! PWNED!" Frodo: "OMG! Gandalf!" **The Balrog falls and in a last act of defiance strikes out with its whip, entangling Gandalf Gandalf: "D'oh" Frodo: "OMG, joo foo!" Gandalf: "fly u foos, fly!" **Gandalf lets go and follows the Balrog into the crevass Gandalf has left the server Balrog has disconnected [After escaping Moria the fellowship finds itself in Loth Lorien] **The fellowship rests, and in the night Frodo speaks with Galadriel Galadriel: "For a noob, u r teh leet!" Frodo: "Sif. I don't want teh ringz0r. Do u want teh ringz0r?" Galadriel: "******! SIF I want teh ringz0r. I have enough h4x of my own!1" [The fellowship leaves Loth Lorien and sets out via river] Saurman: "ph34r my army of uruk hai! Go outz0r, find teh hobbitz and pwnz0r them!" uruk hai: "leet!" [stopping at the banks of the river, the Fellowship sets up camp] **Frodo goes off looking for firewood, Boromir follows and confronts him Boromir: "Gimmie teh ringz0r so ** hax can fight teh boss!" Frodo: "Sif, foo. Punkbuster will pwn joo!" Boromir: "Naw, we play on non-pb servers" Frodo: "STFU noob" Frodo has left the server Boromir: "***! FRODO! Bring teh ringz0r back, faghat!" **A group of Uruk Hai encounter Boromir Boromir: "OH FFS, TEAMS!!" Uruk Hai [arrow] Boromir Uruk Hai [arrow] Boromir Uruk Hai [arrow] Boromir Uruk Hai [arrow] Boromir Uruk Hai [arrow] Boromir Uruk Hai [arrow] Boromir Uruk Hai [arrow] Boromir Uruk Hai [arrow] Boromir Boromir: "****ing campers" **Aragorn comes across the battle Aragorn: "Boromir joo noob! ***!" Uruk Hai: "Hah, pwn!" Aragorn [broadsword] Uruk Hai Aragorn: "I bring joo teh pwn!" **Aragorn goes to Boromir Boromir: "Damn lag!" Warning: Connection problems detected Boromir has disconnected Aragorn: "FFS!" [Frodo returns to the bank of the river where he gets into a boat. Sam 'sees' him] Sam: "Frodo! ***! Invisibility h4x!" Frodo has connected to the server Frodo: "Sam, STFU and FOAD!" Sam: "Sif!" Frodo: "Oh, ffs n00b!" 3Nd!!!!11


Comments

3 responses to “F3ll0wsh1p of teh R1ng”

  1. Oh god, this is too funny! ROTFLMAO

  2. Why does my name matter? Avatar
    Why does my name matter?

    Omfg, you surely don’t have a fucking life.