As I sat on the side of a hill with my wife watching the Ashland fireworks display, we saw a particular explosion that appeared to hit the moon. From behind us we heard a small child tell his mother that a firework hit the moon. After a long pause, the child spoke up again asking an oft asked question by young kids: “Mommie, what is the moon made of?”
It was then that I realized that we had been sitting in front of an expert in the field astronomy and physics as her answer was spoken with such authority and conviction. She replied: “Uh…gases. The moon is made of gas.” I couldn’t believe my ears! All I had been brought up to know regarding the moon came crashing down around me…I felt a tear stream down my face. As if to drive the message home to me, I heard her explain the gases in more detail to her once ignorant, now enlightened offspring. If this fact is true, I thought to myself, how on earth did man walk on the moon if it wasn’t solid matter?!
And then it hit me. I wasn’t sitting in front of a world renown scientist, but a very very misguided woman leading her child into a world of stupidity…I then realized that the tear streaming down my face was caused not by sadness but by laughing so hard at what she had just told her son.
What I want to know is how anyone could even think the moon could be made of anything other than dirt, dust, and rock in this day and age. Man has walked on the moon. Pictures of the surface have been in the media for decades. Heck, movies have been made and books have been written on the rock that rotates around our planet. I feel a great deal stupider having sat so close to such a person and pity her son when he walks into school and gleefully tells his peers about the composition of Earth’s satellite. Ooo boy.
That was a good 4th of July laugh. Whee.
I am a failure to society. Don’t you hate it when you do something (like a tool) thinking things are right and good in the world, then you find evidence that you have actually been mentally handicapped for an entire conversation? You knew something but your mind crumbled. You know you’ve been gaming too long when elements of a game invade your brain and call to question everything you had built your life around. Suck.
This was the case today when my life around came crashing down in an IM battle with Cliff Pearson. The little bastard typed “w/” as an abbreviation for with and I claimed it was “/w.” Now, I’m not the stupidest person in the world…heck, I’ve known with is abbreviated with w/ for years and years. Needless to say I barked on how I was right for minutes until everyone around me said I was a tool. Still thinking I was right, I looked it up and oddly found an answer in Lesson 13 of the NLS: Instructional Manual for Braille Transcribing. Weird.
13.4b Slash (oblique stroke) with single letter abbreviations. Where context makes the
meaning clear, single letter abbreviations that are separated by a slash do not require a
letter sign. These expressions should not be divided between braille lines. Examples:
- c/o Sam Jones
- c/o ,s∙m ,j”os
- b/w TV set
- b/w ,,tv set
In situations where a single letter could be misread, as in (w/copy) where the w is an
abbreviation for with, not will, use a letter sign for clarity.
[Slashes between numbers will be studied in the next lesson. For diagonal slashes used in
poetry see Lesson 18.]
What could have caused this mix up? Especially when I use w/ so frequently. (Google Borkweb for w/).
Then Zach reminded me that I’ve been playing World of Warcraft and DotA for too long. My brain-damaged head decided to convince me that the command for whisper (/w) was the abbreviation for with (w/).
Oh God I hate games. I’m a dork.