At first glance from a distance (and let me emphasize a distance) this kitten looks like any other kitten. He’s small, a little pudgy, and has a curious look in his eyes. He seems to be a happy and healthy kitten. Desipite his appearance, there are a few things about Ducky Chicken Finger that everyone should know:

1. This kitten has ADHD
2. This kitten does NOT sleep
3. This kitten loves to hear the word ‘No’ and will attack you over and over and over and over just to hear the lovely word
4. This kitten is NOT afraid of the ‘spray bottle’ (our disciplinary tool)
5. This kitten eats human flesh
6. This kitten is the spawn of satan

My wife and I have attempted to document his unholy power by the use of digital photos.

Here is the calm before the storm	Begin the windup!	Ducky Crazy Go Nuts
Kitten Golf	Ducky fiddles with coins	Ducky explores the table
Ducky explores the rolling-pin hole	Ducky attacks my arm	Ducky climbs my leg to attack the camera

I went to Zach’s house with Jon and Zach (obviously) after work today to work on our sweet website MasterWish. While there, Sara (Zach’s wife), brought home three homeless kittens (Black, Red, and White-ish Red)! They were fairly dirty so promptly received baths and afterwards I held the black one in a towel to keep it warm. As it sat in my hands our eyes met, a flea jumped onto my hand (which I promptly killed), and it was meant to be. I grinned to my friends as I picked up the phone and called my wife. The conversation went something like this:

Me: “Hi Wife. I’m holding a wet kitten, can I keep it?”
Wife: “Um.”
Zach (in the background): “You should have said you had your hands on a wet pussy.”
Me: “Hi. I have my hands on a wet pussy. Can I keep it? Do you want to drive down to Z’s house to see these three kittens that Sara brought home so we can have one?”
Wife: “Sure. See you in a few minutes.”

Abby agreed that the black one was a keeper (the other two will find their way to a Humane Society) and we were left to think of a name. Now, when the kittens came out of their baths, Jon named them Chicken Finger (the black one), Duck Sauce (the red one), and Crab Rangoon (the whiteish red one)…well, we weren’t too keen on keeping Chicken Finger for our little black cat (save for making Chicken Finger its middle name) so debated all the way home on what the little fur ball’s name would be. Abby thought of the name ‘Ducky’ and it seemed to fit as the kitten has a gimpy left hind leg and waddles like a duck when it walks (sorta). So…the official name of the new cat is Ducky Chicken Finger